Who me, bored? The x’s are the ones I haven’t done:

(_) I NEVER HAVE BEEN DRUNK

(_) I NEVER HAVE SMOKED POT

(_) I NEVER HAVE KISSED A MEMBER OF THE OPPOSITE SEX

(_) I NEVER HAVE KISSED A MEMBER OF THE SAME SEX

(x) I NEVER CRASHED A FRIEND’S CAR

(x) I NEVER BEEN TO JAPAN

(_) I NEVER RODE IN A TAXI

(_) I NEVER HAD ANAL SEX

(_) I NEVER HAVE BEEN IN LOVE

(_) I NEVER HAD SEX

(_) I NEVER HAVE HAD SEX IN PUBLIC

(_) I NEVER HAVE BEEN DUMPED

(_) I NEVER SHOPLIFTED

(x) I NEVER HAVE BEEN FIRED

(x) I NEVER BEEN IN A FIST FIGHT

(_) I NEVER HAD A THREESOME

(x) I NEVER SNUCK OUT OF MY PARENT’S HOUSE

(_) I NEVER BEEN TIED UP (SEXUALLY)

(x) I NEVER BEEN CAUGHT MASTURBATING

(x) I NEVER PISSED ON MYSELF

(_) I NEVER HAD SEX WITH A MEMBER OF THE SAME SEX

(_) I NEVER HAD SEX WITH A MEMBER OF THE OPPOSITE SEX

(x) I NEVER BEEN ARRESTED

(x) I NEVER MADE OUT WITH A STRANGER

(x) I NEVER STOLE SOMETHING FROM MY JOB

(x) I NEVER CELEBRATED NEW YEARS IN TIME SQUARE

(_) I NEVER WENT ON A BLIND DATE

(_) I NEVER LIED TO A FRIEND

(x) I NEVER HAD A CRUSH ON A TEACHER

(x) I NEVER CELEBRATED MARDI-GRAS IN NEW ORLEANS

(x) I NEVER BEEN TO EUROPE

(_) I NEVER SKIPPED SCHOOL

(_) I NEVER SLEPT WITH A CO-WORKER

(x) I NEVER HAVE BEEN FISTED AND/OR HAVE NEVER FISTED ANYONE

(x) I NEVER HAVE THROWN UP IN A BAR

(x) I NEVER HAVE PURPOSELY SET A PART OF MYSELF ON FIRE

(x) I HAVE NEVER WATCHED A JOAN CRAWFORD MOVIE WHILE ON MUSHROOMS

(_) I NEVER TOOK PICTURES OF AND/OR VIDEOTAPED MY SEXUAL ESCAPADES

(x) I HAVE NEVER HAD SEX OR MADE OUT WITH TWO ROOMMATES

Expect another in awhile… but there will also be a real update at some point, I promise.

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